PolyProse

When characters partake in conversation, the audience has the opportunity to examine how a character positions themselves. However, if dialogue falls flat, an audience may tune out or skim, missing valuable information. While grammar is essential, an authentic voice and empathic dialogue decrease the chance of boring an audience. For the seasoned writer, each line of dialogue reveals a hidden facet of character, subtly shifts power dynamics, plants ideas, or drives the plot intentionally.

Character Idiolect:

Music consists of many instruments, rhythms, and tones. As writers, your instruments are your characters. They must be dynamic, unique, and authentic. Imagine your story as a song, and now pretend there is only a trumpet blowing the same note. The song would be dull, unimaginative, and monotonous; hardly music. Each character should possess a distinct cadence, vocabulary, and style to avoid that fate. During the editing process, focus on each character. Listen intently to each line of their dialogue. Decipher if your story is a symphony or a lonely violin missing strings.

1. Shatter the Echo Chamber:

Your characters should have variations in beliefs regarding any subject matter. No matter how close, people disagree at times. 

• Strength: Varying character beliefs open the door to multiple interpretations of conflict. One may believe violence is the answer to a problem, while another suggests diplomacy. 
• Counterpoint: By turning a character into the shadow of another, you can interplay with themes. A villain’s henchman may outwardly agree with everything their ruler says. You might subtly imply that this agreement is rooted in fear or loyalty. The subordinate may lack agency, be brainwashed, or desire acceptance. Alternatively, a character could exist within a global echo chamber. In the novel 1984, Winston Smith lives in Oceania. The society is under constant surveillance, impacting both the community and the plot.

2. Embrace Idiolect:

Pay attention to the unique speech patterns, favorite phrases, and vocabulary of a particular character.

• Strength: When characters use consistent terminology, it is easier for an audience to recognize a speaker. It can also be indicative of a character’s personality. Think of Holden Caulfield, from Catcher in the Rye; he is known for using the word “phonies” when describing others.
• Counterpoint: By removing a character’s personality from their speech, a writer may point to societal themes. Imagine a highly oppressive regime that has created a fascist sociolect. Ensuring all secondary characters sound the same can create an eerie sensation of forced intellectual homogeneity.

3. Present the unspoken:

Subtext can unveil a character’s fears, desires, and past experiences.

• Strength: Subtext can turn insignificant interactions into powerful drivers of plot, characterization revelations, and societal examination.
• Counterpoint: Subtext is nuanced to a degree. As a writer, you may want your audience to understand a passage without ambiguity. When appropriate, clearly state intentions. 

Dialogue as Action:

Dialogue is not a break from action; it is action. Dialogue should be a catalyst for change.

1. Beyond Exposition:

Scrutinize moments of expository dialogue. Consider how to express information in a more evocative manner.

• Strength: Rather than stating a law, showing an example of legal enforcement creates a more vivid image. A character explaining they are arachnophobic is less visual than seeing them run away from lint they thought was a spider. 
• Counterpoint: Word count limits writers. Direct transfer of information may speed up pacing where necessary.

2. The Power of Subtext:

What is the intent of the spoken word, and what can an audience interpret from it?

• Strength: Many people are unable to express their thoughts clearly. People leave gaps in thinking, lie, and say whatever is needed to diffuse situations. By incorporating that into your writing, you can create a sense of realism and make characters believable. 
• Counterpoint: As mentioned previously, subtext can be nuanced. To limit information loss, direct statements may be necessary. Additionally, a poignant, sharp sentence can be dramatic. “You’ll regret this” is ominous, but not as direct as “I’m going to kill you.” 

3. Weaponized words:

Dialogue can cause more harm than physical action. Two characters insulting each other, even without a physical altercation, can increase tension.

• Strength: A quick exchange of words can build friction until they spark physical actions. A rapid-fire interrogation may reveal a character’s thoughts before they can correct themselves or prove their cunning. Think of the episode “The Snowmen” from Doctor Who. Madame Vestra interrogates Clara to question her relationship with the Doctor. Clara Oswald must answer questions with a single word. When Clara asks why, Madame Vestra states, “Truth is singular. Lies are words, words, and words.” Throughout their interaction, Clara vouches for the Doctor. Towards the end, Madame Vestra says, “The Doctor doesn’t help people. Not anyone, not ever. He stands above this world. And doesn’t interfere in the affairs of its inhabitants. He is not your salvation, nor your protector. Do you understand what I am saying to you?” Clara nearly smirks, responding with, “Words.” 
• Counterpoint: Rather than having a character state what they will do, allow them to do it. Sometimes silence speaks louder than action.

Conversational Plot Advancement:

Think of each line as a link in a cause-and-effect chain of actions. Allow character dialogue to test boundaries, seek validation, deflect blame, offer comfort, or shift dynamics.

1. Identifying the Intent:

What is the character trying to achieve with their dialogue in a scene? Are their immediate goals in service of their overarching motivations?

2. The Ripple Effect:

How does this “micro-action” affect the other characters in the scene? What does that reaction tell you about the character relationships, world, and plot?

3. Refine Strategic Word Choice:

Even seemingly small word choices can carry significant weight. A carefully placed “but,” a hesitant pause indicated through punctuation, or a shift in an adjective can signal a subtle change in the interaction.

• Example: In Breaking Bad, Walter White’s quote, “I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger,” is a prime example of a micro-action.
• Analysis:
  • The line is a direct assertion of power and control, marking a turning point in Walter White’s character arc. It is the shift from a meek teacher to a dangerous manipulator.

4. Conciseness Is Key: Eliminating Fluff and Redundancy in Dialogue

Every word must earn its place! Dialogue is no exception.

• Cut the Fat: Trim unnecessary pleasantries, repetitive phrases, and rambling tangents that don’t serve a purpose.
• Show, Don’t Tell: Instead of a character saying, “I’m angry,” their dialogue might be clipped, dismissive, defensive, and sarcastic.
• Pacing and Rhythm: Edit for a natural flow. Short, sharp exchanges can build tension, while longer, more reflective lines can reveal deeper introspection.

5. Editing for Meaning in Conversations

As mentioned previously, people struggle to state their emotions clearly. What is said is often less important than the intention.

• Unpacking the Unspoken: Insert unspoken emotions, hidden agendas, and veiled threats where appropriate.
• Nonverbal Cues: Body language and facial expressions can change the meaning of words. Be conscious not just of what is said but also of how.
• Cultural Context: Be mindful of how cultural norms and unspoken social rules can influence subtext.
  • Example: In The Godfather, Vito Corleone’s famously quoted line, “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse,” is a classic example of subtext.
  • Analysis:
    • At first glance, “I’m going to make him an offer…” is a typical business proposal.
    • However, taking into account Vito’s mafia roots, the phrase “can’t refuse” is an implication of coercion and violence.

6. The Power of Silence: Editing Pauses and Non-Verbal Communication

Dialogue isn’t just about the words spoken; silence, pauses, and nonverbal cues can be just as powerful.

• Indicating Silence: If you do not indicate a break in communication, your audience may not feel the intended effect.
• The Weight of What’s Not Said: Consider what the characters aren’t saying. Think of what your characters are choosing to avoid in their conversations. Then be mindful of what physical reactions a character may endure in the process of omission. 
• Rhythm and Music: Pay attention to the ebb and flow of the conversation. How do the pauses and rhythms contribute to the overall tone and emotional impact of the scene?
  • Example: In the video game Until Dawn, the player must make choices that alter the story. Characters may die permanently. In slow scenes, the player has ample time to make their choices. However, in fast-paced scenes, they are given seconds and at times even less. The player frantically presses buttons to save one character’s life, careful not to inadvertently harm other characters. The length and placement of those pauses control the tension throughout the game. The same ideas could be applied when characters make decisions in conversation and action throughout your works.

7. Avoiding Common Pitfalls: Editing Out Weak and Unrealistic Dialogue

Dialogue lines may have correct spelling and grammar, but can be fundamentally flawed.

• On-the-Nose Dialogue: Watch for characters stating the obvious or explicitly explaining their feelings and motivations. Pay mind to dialogue that doesn’t match their characterization. 
• Exposition Dumps Disguised as Conversation: We don’t usually sit down with a friend and talk about the marriage customs of Tudor times. It is strange for two characters to discuss irrelevant historical topics. Some writers utilize this tactic to explain certain customs or laws. It may be one character saying, “As you well know…” before dumping the existence of dragons and the centuries of damage they have caused. 
• Unnatural Phrasing: Read your dialogue aloud. Does it sound natural, or does it sound like something that belongs on a poster?

8. Dialogue Tags and Attributions: Editing for Clarity and Flow

Dialogue tags are not an afterthought. They guide the flow of conversation and alter the audience’s perspective. 

• Choose what works best: “Said,” “asked,” and “replied” are some of the least intrusive tags. They are usually neutral in connotation, so at times they lack impact. “Whispered,” “shouted,” “sobbed,” “begged,” and other tags may work best based on the context. Unless melodrama is intentional, be cautious of tags like “ejaculated,” “pontificated,” “vociferated,” or “promulgated,” which can be very distracting. 
• Action Beats: Brief descriptions of a character’s actions or expressions can break up long dialogue. Describing locality is essential to avoid “White Room Syndrome.”
• Clarity is Paramount: Ensure it’s always clear who is speaking, especially in conversations with multiple participants.

9. Polishing for Perfection: The Final Dialogue Editing Checklist

Before you consider your dialogue polished, ask yourself these crucial questions:

• Authenticity: Does each character’s voice sound genuine and consistent?
• Purpose: Does every line of dialogue serve a purpose—advancing plot, revealing character, creating conflict, or building tension?
• Conciseness: Is there any unnecessary fluff or redundancy?
• Subtext: Is there a layer of unspoken meaning that adds depth?
• Impact: Does the dialogue resonate emotionally and leave an impression?
• Flow: Does the conversation feel natural and easy to follow?

Writing Exercises

Here are a few exercises to help you practice the concepts we’ve discussed.

• The Single-Topic Conversation: Write a two-character dialogue scene about something mundane, like a trash can. However, include subtext and nonverbal cues that hint at one character trying to force the other to admit a secret. 
• The Unreliable Narrator: Write a short monologue from a character who is lying. The dialogue should be a lie, but allow the character to pretend that they wholeheartedly believe what they are saying. Focus on how their word choice, pacing, and tone give away their true feelings.
• Context Challenge: Take a single, simple line of dialogue, like “That’s a nice shirt.” Write three scenes, only a paragraph or two long. In each scene, use the same dialogue, but vary its meaning. For example, it could be a compliment, an insult, a threat, or a line spoken out of grief at a wake. Consider action beats, nonverbal cues, and subtextual context to toy with the meaning.
• The Monologue Edit: Take a long monologue from your writing. Trim it down to 50% of its original length. Test if you can convey the same information or emotion more concisely.

Conclusion:

The first draft might contain dialogue that feels disjointed and lacks subtext. The structure of a conversation may also be overly simple or completely lack physical descriptions. The raw draft is always rough in nearly every aspect, including dialogue. While you revise and edit your lines, think to yourself, “Are my characters authentically portrayed with a consistent and genuine voice?” Think to yourself. “Do each of my lines serve a purpose to advance the plot, reveal character, interact with conflict, or any other purpose I have intended? Examine the flow of the conversation and the effects of each line; make sure they serve their intended purpose. It may take multiple drafts of your novel before you’re confident enough to inspect for subtext and to incorporate it where appropriate. Ultimately, dialogue is one way your character can communicate with your audience. Consider what your characters choose to say and how they express it. Reflect on whether that aligns with what you want your audience to perceive. If you try the exercises above, come back and tell me what you learned from them; I’d love to hear it. 

Tools for the Job

While practice can sharpen your skills, consider adding tools to your arsenal. For tight and impactful lines, I rely on QuillBot to help me get the job done. It streamlines and refines your prose faster than you could alone. It enables you to explore different methods of delivering dialogue to help avoid the pitfalls we discussed. Here is my affiliate link: (https://try.quillbot.com/polyprose)

For the bigger picture, especially when you’re managing complex character voices and interwoven dialogue arcs across a full-length novel, an organizational tool is invaluable. Scrivener solves this, and that is why I purchased it before my free trial ended. Its user-friendly interface allows you to keep track of characters, locations, plot beats, and more. Here is my affiliate link: (https://www.literatureandlatte.com/scrivener-affiliate.html?fpr=polyprose)